"What the Hell is that? You're kidding me- they have two different varieties?" I scoffed, noting that both the cookies and the boxes were nearly the same with the exception of the flashy, red lettering on the "original" box.
A few years ago, I discovered that the cookies that were a part of my childhood were suddenly missing. Earlier in the year, a friend came by with a box of the "new" recipe and I was happy to see them back on the shelves. Not realizing the recipe had changed, I popped the whole, tiny, soft cookie into my mouth and started to chew. "Pttfffftttttttt!" I spit it out as my head hung over the kitchen sink. It was a disgusting display of manners, I'm certain. Especially, I'm told, for a lady. One other fact was also certain, I had never spit out an Entenmann's product in my entire life.
Making the Elvis lip, inadvertently and to the best of my ability, which ironically, is the same face I make when smelling something awful like the insole of my favorite pair of cozy boots, I tried the "Original Recipe". Voila! Perfection! My taste buds were so happy! My once-crushed, fond memory was restored like dry skin to moisturizer. One after another, the cookies disappeared and between the four of us, the box of about 30 cookies was gone within 30 minutes.
Logically, I was unable to process why a company would 1) cease production of a product high in demand, 2) create a new recipe that was not time-tested, and 3) then send them both back to the bakery to confuse and infuriate the consumer? So, I went to their website and saw the Entenmann's brand has been sold many times since the 1970s and is now operated by Bimbo Bakeries (click on "United Sates").
Comparing the two product labels, high fructose corn syrup, my self-declared sworn enemy, rears its ugly head farther down the ingredients list than the new recipe. The new recipe also adds disgusting potassium sorbate, soy lecithin, more artificial flavors, milk products, and more.
Chocolate Chips (Sugar, Chocolate Liquor, Cocoa Butter, Cocoa Processed With Alkali Dextrose,Vanillin, Lecithin), Flour Bleached, Sugar,Vegetable(s) Shortening, Partially Hydrogenated (Soybean(s) Oil, Cottonseed Oil), Egg(s), Corn Syrup High Fructose, Wheat Starch, Butter, Sugar Invert, Molasses, Salt, Corn Starch Modified, Baking Soda,Flavor(s) Natural & Artificial
Milk Chocolate Recipe (NEWish)-
Wheat Flour Bleached, Milk Chocolate Chips (Sugar,Chocolate Liquor, Cocoa Butter, Milk Skim Powder, Butter Oil, Soya Lecithin An Emulsifier, Vanillin An Artificial Flavor), Sugar, Vegetable(s) Shortening Partially Hydrogenated (Soybean(s), Cottonseed), Corn Syrup High Fructose, Milk Non-Fat, Wheat Starch, Egg(s), Corn Starch Modified, Salt, Baking Soda, Water, Carob Bean Gum, Flavor(s) Artificial, Potassium Sorbate Preservative, Lemon(s) Juice Concentrate, Caramel Color
Mind-boggling, ain't it?
I mean, who messes with a good thing but someone who is just asking for trouble? So, I thought Bimbo should know about it and went to their website to issue my comments. Concurrently, my boyfriend also decided to comment.
Mine read something like, "My family has been buying Entenmann's for 50+ years and has trusted the brand. The taste between cookies is substantial and I can actually taste the high fructose corn syrup which lingers and never satisfies. Please don't change a good thing because when it comes to the quality of ingredients in the foods I feed my family, I have no product loyalty and will cease buying Entenmann's products." That's the gist of it.
My boyfriend commented something like, "I was so happy to see the Original Recipe cookies back on the shelf, blah, blah, blah, kiss your ass, blah, blah, blah. Thank you, blah, blah" That's the gist of it.
I received an email from Bimbo:
We will be glad to document your request for this particular product. We place tremendous value on input from our consumers. Your inquiry will be used to plan our product variety.
You are a valued consumer and we appreciate that you took the time and interest to contact us. We hope that you will continue to enjoy our products.
Consumer Relations Department
***This email is generated from an unmonitored mailbox. If you have further questions please, contact Consumer Relations at 1-800-984-0989.***
A week later, my boyfriend received mail from Bimbo. Inside, there was a nice type-written letter thanking him for his comments, a magnet, and several dollar-off product coupons.
Why, Bimbo? Why would you not also send me coupons and magnets? Criticism is your friend, Bimbo, your friend! My boyfriend did you no favors by pandering to your ego, Bimbo! I told you the ugly truth, that your milk chocolate chip cookies SUCK. I bet Warner-Lambert, General Foods, Kraft, Bestfoods, Unilever, and George Weston (all who have owned the Entenmann's name over the years) wouldn't treat a loyal customer this way! See, all you had to do was send me a few coupons and we wouldn't be having this rant, right now. I'd be lauding you, Bimbo. Further, my satisfaction comes cheaply with a couple bucks off of my next purchase, but nooooooo, there is nothing for Gabrielle, except the dissatisfying taste of your new cookies.